Your Relationship Affects Your Identity

While most important relationships can experience a fair share of highs and lows, the relationships in our life should be usually pleasant. In fact, the word relationship is defined as the state of being connected. There should be some mutual benefit, exchange or connection within every relationship. The people we choose to allow into our lives should typically provide some level of friendship, companionship, or support. However, there may be relationships in your life where you find yourself repeatedly on the giving end of the relationship. Even worse, you can find yourself emotionally drained and resentful.


Does God want us to be agreeable, even in difficult relationships?

Since the Bible teaches us to love others, we may sometimes allow people to repeatedly cross the boundaries of offense. However, we have a responsibility to take care of the different areas in our lives. When a relationship is impacting our time, other relationships, health, and mental wellbeing, we should take action to come to a place of peace – whether we decide to continue the relationship or not.


How can you find peace?

1. Understand the purpose of the relationship. Some relationships help motivate and discipline you, while others may strengthen and train you. Consider the relationship you may have with a coach. A fitness coach may ask you to do uncomfortable things to help you reach your goals. These types of relationships may feel awkward at first, but they are working to make you better. 

2. Set boundaries. Every relationship has its purpose, however we need to establish boundaries to take responsibility for what we allow in our lives. 

It takes wisdom to know when to invest time and energy into a relationship and when to withhold. The book of Ecclesiastes shares that there is a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing. There will be times when you need to limit a relationship, while other times you will need to avoid contact altogether. 

Read the book called Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. This book provides actionable principles to establish real boundaries in our relationships, especially with difficult people.


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Another way you can manage your difficult relationships is to surround yourself with more positive people. Click to get connected, and you’ll be connected with someone who can help you discover a community of people that will energize your life rather than drain your energy.

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